Apple Keynote Bingo

September 2018 Edition


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The never ending quest to avoid calling it “pink” Footage of pleasingly diverse (for Apple) employees in a glass meeting room Still not round, though, is it? Computer controlled milling machine action shot Dreadful skit
Losing track of the number of things Steve Jobs would never have allowed Smiling children in an emerging market play with an iPad Watch strap made of something weird (e.g. soylent green, unicorn hair) Respect the OLED…and tame the notch All the colours! Available in all the colours!
Everyone loses their shit about something technical Retweet of Oatmeal cartoon about owning an Apple product FreeSpace “Our most affordable expensive phone ever” Your old watch is junk! JUNK!
Eddy Cue does some dad dancing ZING! Take THAT Google! Stealthy upgrade to a product not mentioned in the Keynote Lots of iPhone-shot pictures of smiling Caucasians A new app that looks OK, but nothing special
Jony: “I won’t be happy until it’s just a featureless block of metal”. Steve Jobs Staff Restaurant Whatever, it’s still a square watch The ever-growing confusion of which devices get true-tone, force-touch, mega-frame-rate New, fairly dreary, feature gets ridiculous name (e.g. “Power Station”)

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Made with love in Edinburgh, Scotland by @patrickhmason and @davidmoss Want more snark? Try Trollem Ipsum