Apple Keynote Bingo

WWDC 2015 Edition


Play again?
Apple TV (joke)That’s a NICE new Apple StoreFit women running conspicuously wearing watchesAn incomprehensible quantity of iMessages allegedly deliveredEveryone loses their shit about something technical
Tedious “curated radio stations”“It’s in beta, right now”A tweet that just says “oooh” followed by a bunch of hashtagsSomething to do with home automation. A refrigerator perhaps“We think it’s great”
Disappointment as all the rumours turn out to be EXACTLY trueThat’s the glasshole moment, right thereFreeSpacePoorly implemented cloud featuresPrice point slightly too high, but not high enough to stop you buying
Content rights holders visibly soiling themselvesInane fratboy-esque whooping from the audienceNew HQ continues to feel like vapourwareThey Didn’t Forget About DreMarco Arment tweets “‘Shit’ – [maker of usurped feature]”
Streaming free for iTunes Match users? Yes!Nice independent software maker totally undermined by a new featureFirst troll-y article claiming to be “bored of Apple”Swift? Maybe. I’m not a developer. I don’t careWHERE’S THE FUCKING CAR, APPLE.

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Made with love in Edinburgh, Scotland by @patrickhmason and @davidmoss Want more snark? Try Trollem Ipsum