Apple Keynote Bingo

September 2017 Edition


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Time-lapse of new office reacting to weather conditions Tim Cook’s thin, watery smile Computer controlled milling machine action shot [a Drag Race GIF that perfectly illustrates something] Beyond-acceptable pricing, magically justifying itself by Friday
Enterprise! Woo yeah! *rolls eyes* Super-earnest medical research VT Everyone loses their shit about something technical Steve Jobs Staff Restaurant Poorly implemented cloud features
100% more glass for extra shatterability Eddy Cue does some dad dancing FreeSpace “We hope you like it” HOW MUCH?!?!?
Apple’s lack of diversity manifests itself on stage once again Deluded attempt to fix the Apple TV by changing the interface again Apple effectively claims to have invented HDR iPhone X (“The ‘X’ makes it sound cool”) Phil Schiller
Dreadful skit Jony: “I won’t be happy until it’s just a featureless block of metal”. Steve Jobs Theatre 4K Apple TV is only actually 3.999K Stealthy upgrade to a product not mentioned in the Keynote

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Made with love in Edinburgh, Scotland by @patrickhmason and @davidmoss Want more snark? Try Trollem Ipsum