Apple Keynote Bingo

September 2018 Edition


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“Our most affordable expensive phone ever” Eddy Cue does some dad dancing Disappointment as all the rumours turn out to be EXACTLY true Sir Jony Ive “It’s available in beta, right now”
Steve Jobs Theatre AirPods still make you look like an idiot Inane fratboy-esque whooping from the audience New Apple TV screensavers iPhone XSDoublePlusGood
The never ending quest to avoid calling it “pink” Time-lapse of new office reacting to weather conditions FreeSpace Computer controlled milling machine action shot Apple Pay stats
Whatever, it’s still a square watch A tweet that just says “oooh” followed by a bunch of hashtags “We love music, but you wouldn’t think so given this closing performance” The Verge hits 10 “articles” before the thing’s even finished Stealthy upgrade to a product not mentioned in the Keynote
“We hope you like it” Everyone loses their shit about something technical Still not round, though, is it? Your old watch is junk! JUNK! That moment when you didn‘t think you wanted one, but you really do

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