Apple Keynote Bingo

September 2018 Edition


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“We think it’s great” 9.42am! Dreadful skit They’re good phones, Brent. Footage of pleasingly diverse (for Apple) employees in a glass meeting room
The ever-growing confusion of which devices get true-tone, force-touch, mega-frame-rate MOAR WATCH STRAPS “Our most affordable expensive phone ever” The never ending quest to avoid calling it “pink” Stealthy upgrade to a product not mentioned in the Keynote
Siri can now misunderstand you in a wider variety of home automation circumstances ZING! Take THAT Google! FreeSpace Serenity Caldwell! iPhone XSDoublePlusGood
Eddy Cue Eddy Cue does some dad dancing Your old watch is junk! JUNK! Poorly implemented cloud features Thin as a feature
Tim Cook HOW MUCH?!?!? New, fairly dreary, feature gets ridiculous name (e.g. “Power Station”) “Let me show it to you” Smiling children in an emerging market play with an iPad

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Made with love in Edinburgh, Scotland by @patrickhmason and @davidmoss Want more snark? Try Trollem Ipsum