Apple Keynote Bingo

Hello Again
October 2016 Edition


Play again?
Hopes the “music” act isn‘t a DJ cross-fading on the touchbar Where’s the Mac Pro update, Apple? New, fairly dreary, feature gets ridiculous name (e.g. “Power Station”) “Let me show it to you” ZING! Take THAT Google!
Inane fratboy-esque whooping from the audience Swift? Maybe. I’m not a developer. I don’t care Physical Escape key sold for $9.99 and €9.99, but also £9.99 (f*ck you, Brexit) First “hands-on” from CNet that is anything but EXCRUCIATING third party demo
No headphone port! *Muppet arm flail* Enterprise! Woo yeah! *rolls eyes* FreeSpace Tim Cook Phil Schiller
Eddy Cue Like a MacBook Pro… but thinner They Forgot About Dre [Seriously, tho – MagSafe was ace. WHY, APPLE? WHY?] New office… or Deathstar?
Something to do with home automation. A refrigerator perhaps? Nice independent software maker totally undermined by a new feature Male presenters undo yet another shirt button “We love music, but you wouldn’t think so given this closing performance” “We hope you like it”

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Made with love in Edinburgh, Scotland by @patrickhmason and @davidmoss Want more snark? Try Trollem Ipsum