|Inane fratboy-esque whooping from the audience
||You get a Pro thing, You get a Pro thing, EVERYBODY GETS A PRO THING!
||“It’s in beta, right now”
||iPhone X (“The ‘X’ makes it sound cool”)
|Siri on more stuff – more uselessness, more of the time
||All the colours! Available in all the colours!
||Tech nerds moaning about open-plan offices
||Tim Cook’s thin, watery smile
||A new app that looks OK, but nothing special
|“We love music, but you wouldn’t think so given this closing performance”
||Apple Pay stats
||100% more glass for extra shatterability
|Eddy Cue does some dad dancing
||Glimmers of hope that ARKit might actually have practical applications
||Everyone loses their shit about something technical
||“Let me show it to you”
||“I’ll never get used to that!” *gets used to it almost immediately*
|Totally off-the-mark and utterly uncool original video content
||Attempting to fix the Apple TV remote with software update
||Jony: “I won’t be happy until it’s just a featureless block of metal”.
||They killed Touch ID! You bastards!