Apple Keynote Bingo

Hello Again
October 2016 Edition


Play again?
Siri on more stuff - more uselessness, more of the timeThey Forgot About Dre“Oh, you started with a single piece of aluminium, did you?”“We love music, but you wouldn’t think so given this closing performance”They Didn’t Forget About Dre
Headphone jack now via USB-C -> lightning -> 3.5mm adapterAdvertSomething to do with home automation. A refrigerator perhaps?ZING! Take THAT Google!Beats 2: all the middle-of-the-roads hits, all the time.
“We hope you like it”Nice independent software maker totally undermined by a new featureFreeSpaceLike a MacBook Pro… but thinnerAll the colours! Available in all the colours!
“Let me show it to you”Here comes the finance bit!“Boom!/Bam!” or other onomatopoeic wordYou get a Pro thing, You get a Pro thing, EVERYBODY GETS A PRO THING!Can you play the function key panel like a cheap child’s toy piano? I hope so
Myraid ports replaced by USB-CInane fratboy-esque whooping from the audienceEven the fanboys seem bored with iterative improvementJony: “I won’t be happy until it’s just a featureless block of metal”.“Here it is”

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Made with love in Edinburgh, Scotland by @patrickhmason and @davidmoss Want more snark? Try Trollem Ipsum