| Here comes the finance bit! | Body made of a substance you’ve never heard of | A new app that looks OK, but nothing special | “We think it’s great” | Tacit admission battery life wasn't good enough |
| “Boom!/Bam!” or other onomatopoeic word | ASYMCO makes a new chart; you wonder how he has the time | “..but better” | To the tune of “Mna-mna”: “Peripheral-do-do-do-do-do!” | “Innovation” |
| Someone says “This is exactly how Steve would have done it” | Tim Cook | New feature not rolled out to legacy product | Smiling children in an emerging market play with an iPad | Bitterness from Gizmodo that they are not invited |
| “mini” | Too small | No specific name, just iPad | Crucial feature not yet rolled out to larger iPad makes small one more desirable | Instagrammed photo of the Keynote (a.k.a. Tim Cook with a vintage feel) |
| Awful game uses INCREDIBLE new GPU capacity | Click wheel iPod silently, and ruthlessly, killed | Better GPS means more accurate “location-based dating” | Phil Schiller | You are retweeted by a techblogger |
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